What do I owe …

This is my favorite time of the year. The leaves are changing colors, it is nice, not too warm or not too cold… . A new season is in, everything in nature is preparing for the new, letting go of the old. Isnt it funny how day by day nothing changes but when you look back everything is different.

 I did a bible plan during this week ( thank you husband dear for the recommendation) about the four enemies of the heart that steal our happiness and blessings , namely Guilt, Anger, Greed and Jealousy. Guilt that says I owe someone , anger that says Someone owes me , Greed that says I owe me and Jealousy that says God owes me. Very simple and powerful. Every time i am sad or angry or jealous now i tell myself Does he/she really owe me, does God really owe me? HasnĀ“t He blessed me enough? Indeed He has.. Grateful i am for it.

 One of the biggest realization i have had in the recent days has been about how i have always been a closed person, meaning that my way of dealing with difficult feelings has been indifference. So instead of being honest and talking about the difficult things , I often decide to ignore texts , phone calls or meetings. I have a million explanations about the origins of the behavior but I have decided to consciously condition myself out of this behavior. Because indifference is the exact opposite of everything i want in.. life, love and faith. No one owes me .. And i have no point to prove to anyone .


I am lucky and grateful that to be loved without conditions, loved for who I am and not what I do , loved without any complains, the list goes on… . So my mission now is to just spread out some of the immeasurable love I recieve every day.. to actually LISTEN without judgement, show appreciation and love beyond measures and stop complaining.. Like Ingrid Betancourt says Fear is contagious but so is faith.



 PS: Loved this  Ted talk https://ideas.ted.com/fear-is-contagious-but-so-is-faith-a-hostages-story/























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